Letters To Johnny
by JohnnyCakeObsession
Summary: WARNING THIS STORY CONTAINS SPOILERS! Johnny is dead. Pony's best friend is dead. He writes his anger and sadness down onto a letter, addressing it to Johnny. The gang slowly starts to find out about his letters and Pony is left to grieve in a different way. What Johnny's last words really meant to Pony, he'll soon find out.
1. Chapter 1

**WARNING: THIS STORY** **WILL** **CONTAIN SPOLIERS. IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE BOOK THEN I RECOMMEND YOU DON'T READ THIS.**

 **This is my first Outsiders fanfic, so if there is anything wrong with my grammar/story line please let me know. So if you read the description you would know that this takes place after the death of Johnny. Ponyboy goes a little insane because his best friend died. I mean, wouldn't you? So I hope you enjoy this and please give reviews!**

Dear Johnny,

Ever since that day I've been sick. Not as in coughing and stuff. I mean I sick in the head. Soda says I need to move on. I question him thinking, " _move on from what?_ " I'm still lead to believe you aren't dead. That's why I'm writing this. Darry said if I wanted to move on I needed to write down all my negative thoughts into a journal or paper.

I decided I would write to you. I know it sounds stupid writing to a dead person, but it helps. I don't expect any letters in return. The note you left me in _Gone With The Wind_ you said to tell Dally all these things, but I hate to break it to you. After you died, Dally went berserk. He robbed a grocery store and then ran from the cops. Pretty stupid, right? He called us saying he was gonna be at the lot. I think he just said that so we could just watch him die. Yeah, the cops shot him to death. But ya know? He had a look of triumph. So I'm sorry I couldn't tell Dally everything you said.

Maybe he wouldn't have died if I found that note sooner. Gah, it's my fault. I keep thinking that your death was my fault. If we hadn't jumped into that burning church, then maybe you would still be alive. But then the kids would have burned…It's hard to think about. Well, I best be going now. Darry says we're gonna go to Dairy Queen to celebrate the victory of our rumble. Take care will ya, Johnny?

Your Best Friend,

Ponyboy


	2. Chapter 2

**I DO NO OWN THE OUTSIDERS**

 **Thank you all for the nice reviews! I'm actually writing this late at night so sorry if there is any spelling/grammar mistakes! I had kind of a writers block, but I should be good now! Now onward to chapter 2…**

Dear Johnny,

The doctor just left the room. I can hear him whispering some things to Darry… the doc says I'm sick. Sick in the head. He said it's hard to deal with this kind of stuff at a young age. Maybe if I was placed in a boy's home, things would have been different. No, no. I shouldn't think like that. After everything Darry went through to own custody of me and Soda, I can't think like that. I can't think at all. Life has been pretty down since you….nevermind.

Your mother came by a few days ago, saying it was our fault you died. In a way, it was their fault. Your folks never cared about you. The gang was all you had. Well you don't need those worthless drunks anyways. At least we got those Socs back. We got them back for every little thing they've done to us. That's good, right Johnny?

Sorry, sorry, I'm getting this letter wet with tears, but I'm fine really. I just…miss you. You were my best friend. You still are. Maybe one day we'll meet again.

Until Then,

Ponyboy


	3. Chapter 3

**I DO NOT OWN THE OUTSIDERS**

 **Ok so I honestly have no idea where to take this story. Before I was thinking to make it 16 chapters and now realizing it, there's no way I can continue this story that far. So I'm thinking 10 or 8. What's your opinion? Help me out ;-; Anyways onto the actual story!**

Dear Johnny,

After I wrote that last letter, Soda found it. He had me sit in front of the gang and explain my letters. After that, they gave me a group hug and said it ok to grieve for a while. I don't understand. Grieve? Why am I grieving? They said something about holding onto a loved one.

They're probably talking nonsense. I mean, you're ok! You're fine! I saw you at the lot today and even TALKED to you! THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND JOHNNY! THEY WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND! BAHAHAHA HAHAHAHA WE'RE JUST GREASERS AFTER ALL! WE DON'T GRIEVE FOR OUR LOST ONES!

I guess I was actually saying that stuff out loud, cause Soda came in and slapped me. Soda has never slapped me… Am I going insane? I'm losing my mind Johnny! I can't accept the idea of you being dead! The gang knows all about my letters…

I guess I am losing my mind. Ever since that day, I've been failing in school, tripping up on things, and losing my emotions all together! I don't want to end up like Dally…and I don't mean dead either, I mean before that.

Johnny. Promise me you'll never change. Please tell me you'll be that soft puppy eyed boy forever. I don't want anyone to change. Promise me, ok? Until the day where we meet again, stay gold.

Your buddy,

Ponyboy

 **Lol I stole a line from the movie/book XD So Pony is going kinda insane and now the gang knows about his letters! :O Whats gon happen!? You'll find out soon! So I might just do 2 more chapters. Will Pony get over his grief? Will he find his mind? When will I stop asking questions? Find out in the next chapter!**


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